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movie review - Cars

the journal of Michael Werneburg

twenty-seven years and one million words

Tokyo, 2012.12.14

This is a much-celebrated animated movie from much-celebrated Pixar. Which, frankly, has seen much better days. This movie is a mess on several levels, from the central plot seeming to be "every privileged white male douche-bag gets what he wants" to the downright disturbing physiology of the cars. The plot is thin at best and the revelations are underwhelming. It really, really, really doesn't hold up to repeat viewings and by god my four year old has this thing on the DVD player 7x24.

I cannot overstate what a fiasco this movie is, I think that Pixar made something that's visually appealing if not terribly original but completely phoned it in, in every other respect. It's insincere, stupid, patronizing, sexist (the lead female exists as a high-status acquisition for the male lead, being a Porsche with pin-stripe tramp-stamp detailing), and boring.

Not recommended. Or; strongly recommended to NOT watch.

BONUS ROUND: In an early scene two female characters show their breast-substitute headlights to the main douche-bag star car. Later it's revealed that his own headlights are decals. WTF is up with the physiology of these effing cars. Why do they have tongues when they are shown to use fuel. (Sobs into his hands.)

rand()m quote

If you want your wife to listen to you, then talk to another woman: she will be all ears.

—Sigmund Freud