journal features
movie reviews
photo of the day

movie review - Descendants

the journal of Michael Werneburg

twenty-seven years and one million words

Toronto, 2019.07.15

This is a direct-to-whatever movie from Disney. It turned out to be a surprise hit and all I can say is that if you're going to plunk your kids in front of this, just get out of there. It's a teenage melodrama and about the only thing I can say for it is that there aren't sequels. It's about the children of the villains from Disney's classic properties I mean tales attending the private high school of the children of the Disney heroes. The bad children are ever so slightly wicked, by which I mean they cosplay bad children and are nowhere near as repugnant as the worst my suburban junior high school had to offer (let alone my high school, which had stabbings and a prostitution ring, sadly).

Recommended. But for children only! Their soft minds and lack of context will sponge this stuff up. Adults: do not watch this insufferable trite melodrama. If you need something to watch with your kids it should be one of the Paddington movies.

rand()m quote

The point isn't revenge. It is justice. Revenge is like a wave that washes up on shore - it always washes back out again. Justice is like the shore - it's still there after the wave comes and goes.

—commenter "JP" on a Rolling Stone article about the crooks running Wall Street